My husband and I have been married for 2 yrs. His 2 kids from 1st marriage now live with his ex wife and he is supposed to see them on weekends now. There is no court order for custody and no order for support, however, we carry the medical, dental and eye insurance for them, plus we help make monthly payments for the older one's orthodonture bill, plus her cell phone!! ( ages are 15 and 10). Now on weekends, his ex notifies him by text msgs that the she has plans for the kids and they won't be coming over. This is becoming a regular thing now, he has not seen the kids for 3 weeks! She is doing this to him again as I type this which is what prompted me to seek advice and help from others. Does he have any rights as a father who is paying for his kids? Should we try for something more legal, or would it backfire in his face and he still end up with nothing?
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Paying child support has nothing to do with custody and visitation. They are separate things and good parents are entitled to whichever one (or both) if they apply. It would be a shame to involve the courts if they've managed this long without them, but you may have no choice. The father has the right to see the kids. He should try talking to the kids directly about what is going on. It may be that they may have activities or things they want to do that they are afraid their dad would not take them to (even though he might be perfectly fine with it). On the other hand, if they are being withheld from seeing their dad against their will, that is something you will want to know too. You will want to understand what is behind it before you go to court. If the kids are choosing to stay home, going to court could backfire. Have him reach out to the kids and let them know he wants to see them. Encourage him to let them know that he will still take them to their activities, let them see their friends, etc. Good luck!
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