I want dental insurance so I can go to my own dentist. Is there any program that allows that. I?

I am a widow over 65. My dentist is not enrolled in any programs.
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You need to get a dental PPO rather then an HMO- if you can afford it. A PPO usually allows you to go to any dentist of your choice. PPO's usually don't limit you to picking a dentist within a certain group or getting a referral to see a specialist.
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